Sit back in your chair. What happened after my reagents took hold? What sooth did I see? What insights did I glean?

Firstly a visit to Spain is loooong over due. Barcelona is only a few hours from here by car. In my minds eye I traced a visit to Spain in a car I purchased from a suitable car broker.

The thin black line is my intended route. It has all the essential visits for someone who knows nothing about Spain, finds a map with google image search and butchers it with MSpaint.

Hugging the coast from Marseilles I will adopt my Spanish costume as I cross the border.

I will not wear a German scarf. Ever.

In Barcelona I will marvel at the vibrant pulsating city of communal baths with artwork to match.

Listening to Heroes in my flavour enhancer induced stupor I heard the main villain say;

“The Gypsy takes the path of least resistance”

With this in mind I will head to the Gypsy strong hold of Vigo in Galicia.

Carnival, Carnival, CARNIVALLLLLLLLLL!

Vigo is the home of man mountain El Fuerte. It is also the home of my Spanish fan club. I will be welcomed as a returning hero, a ticker tape parade, huge communal baths, horse sacrifices! It will be incredible.

After many months of diligently learning Spanish and the local customs it will be with teary eyes I leave Vigo. But I think I will take a small part of Vigo with me, in my horse strengthened heart.

From Vigo I will travel South East to Madrid. Pausing in the sweltering city to catch a breath I will then drive to somewhere far more interesting.

Toledo!!!!!

Oh to be dressed in a Batman costume in Toledo and to have someone say “Holy Toledo Batman”

What a huge accomplishment that would be.

From Toledo I will head to Valencia and have a few wistful moments for the New Zealand Americas cup team who lost valiantly in Valencia.I might need to lose my car here as well.

From Valencia it is to Ibiza bitches. Ibiza is a gypsy pilgrimage if there ever was one. If I time things right I will get there just as the closing parties start and most of the Italians and English have gone home.

From here it is on to Palma to resume my career in Super Yachts.

Or is it……….?