Well our Security guards managed to put our treadmill into a state by setting the incline to 40 degrees in a 2 metres of sea. This caused the worm gear to get horribly out of sync. The Second Engineer and I took it apart and after consulting the manual I managed to recalibrate the incline setting with the computer and it is back to normal. I seriously wonder why we have security guards. On our last crossing they destroyed an exercise bike. I think you could set up a company with robotic ScareSentries (patent pending) and make/save a lot of money.

We did an equator crossing. I again sat it out. Its a revolting shameful tradition which should be phased out. One of the stewadess’s asked me why I did not take part. I replied “I am too old and sensible.” Words I do not think I have ever uttered.

Does that look like fun?

Our Second Officer has just made an announcement of land ho. I actually think I will kiss the first grass that I see. We had an announcement of rain on the way down. Its funny how you miss things after a few months.

Today I targeted our television Satellite and got a call centre in South Africa to hit our decoders. On a Sunday no less. Getting South Africans to do anything is an achievement in my books. Getting them to do it on a weekend is impressive.

Clever me.